Relationships — whether they’re a platonic friendship, a romantic partnership, or a civil union — involve two or more people. They’re built on a variety of factors, including mutual feelings like limerence, love, affection, solidarity, or regular business interactions. They may also be governed by laws and customs that dictate how the individuals in the relationship should act toward each other.
When relationships work, couples can find themselves in a peaceful coexistence that’s socially, emotionally, and physically satisfying. When relationships don’t work, however, it can be a painful process to get back on track. While most relationships have their share of challenges and hiccups, there are steps that can be taken to avoid some of the biggest potholes.
1. It’s a good fit.
In the early days of a romance, it’s easy to get caught up in the excitement and giddy feeling of being in love. But if you want your relationship to last, you have to be willing to face the tough questions about where it’s going in the long term. If you don’t have an honest discussion about where your relationship is heading, it could lead to some major misunderstandings down the road.
2. It’s a healthy balance of dependency and independency.
A successful relationship requires both people to be happy and fulfilled as individuals, without making each other dependent or “complete.” That’s why it’s important for both partners to have interests outside the relationship. They can be separate activities, such as meeting with friends or engaging in favorite hobbies, or they can be things related to the relationship, such as volunteering or pursuing educational goals. A couple should be able to support each other’s activities, even when they don’t fully align with their own interests.
3. It’s a respectful and caring relationship.
Respect in a relationship is key to preventing misunderstandings and emotional distress. A respectful relationship requires both people to listen actively and respond kindly. It also means addressing any issues that come up, such as disagreements about finances or household chores. Having a caring relationship means being there for one another, both emotionally and physically. This can include helping with a medical condition, taking care of the kids or elderly parents, and providing emotional support during difficult times.
4. It’s a loving and supportive relationship.
A loving and supportive relationship is a solid foundation for any couple, especially when there are difficult periods in their lives. For example, if a partner loses a job or struggles with depression, the other partner can help them through this difficult time. A loving and supportive relationship also involves being there for the little things, such as remembering a birthday or making time to chat after a long day.
5. It’s a healthy and respectful relationship.
A healthy and respectful relationship is a place where each person feels valued and loved. It’s a place where each person has a voice, where they feel heard and understood, and where they know that their needs are being met. A healthy and respectful relationship is a place for both parties to grow as individuals, while supporting each other through hard times.